We all make New Year’s Resolutions that are supposed to make us better people. Recently I decided to clear the clutter from my life and tried every diet and self improvement program I could find. Some of these programs kept my interest longer than others but none of them fulfilled me in the way I had hoped. The weight did not come off as easily as it went on and my attitude did not see much improvement either. In fact, my family told me that I really needed a total attitude adjustment. Some days I did not seem to see any good in anybody or anything. It was then that I discovered Donna Par tow's book, Becoming the Woman I Want to Be: A 90 Day Journey to Renewing Spirit, Soul, and Body.
When I read the book I began to realize that our homes are not the only things that can become cluttered with unnecessary things. Our lives can become so cluttered that we go through life with burdens that we are not meant to bear. I then made a vow to rid my life of these burdens so that I could really enjoy life and family and friends to the fullest.
The first thing I decided to discard was an old cracked jar that was filled with stones of various shapes and sizes. The was my jar of troubles that had really slowed my growth and enjoyment of life. The stones were different sizes because my troubles were different sizes. Some were so minor that the solutions came with no major work on my part. Others were the size of boulders because I had been so overwhelmed by them that I was literally crippled by the weight. Under these troubles I had been forced to my knees. Although God had promised to bear these burdens for me I had not let Him. Instead I had insisted on holding onto them and not given Him control of my life.
The next thing I threw in the discard pile was a rusty old bucket. This bucket held tears that had fallen throughout my life. This bucket is extremely heavy and its weight has made by back become stooped and bent. Again at times few tears fell into the bucket and at other times I did not think the bucket would hold them all. Again I remembered God’s promise that He will wipe the tears from our eyes and bear all our troubles. I had insisted on handling these situations myself instead of giving them to Him.
I then looked into a box that was falling apart at the seams. In this box I found grudges that I had held against other people in my life. Although I had professed to forgive these people I held onto the grudges. I admit that these grudges were very difficult to let go and I knew that I must release them in order to clear out the clutter that was taking over my life. I definitely needed to place this box in the discard pile. I realized that when I failed to totally forgive others and carried these grudges with me I was only hurting myself. The person that needed the forgiveness was not harmed by these grudges. I was being harmed by packing this box with me wherever I went. The box was so heavy that my legs and back were beginning to ache with the weight. The people I failed to truly forgive did not have this weight to carry. Again I heard God whisper, “I paid the penalty for your sins and have forgiven you. Why do you think you are justified in not forgiving others?
I then looked into a ragged suitcase and found regrets stuffed in there. Regrets for the things I did not say to others who needed encouragement. Regrets for times I could've helped someone else but because of my selfishness and unconcern neglected to. I found regrets for the times I was “too busy" or "preoccupied" to spend time with my kids because of my misplaced priorities. I could not bear to look into the suitcase any longer so I slammed the lid shut and locked these regrets in so I would not have to think about them any longer. it was a tremendous relief to put the suitcase into the discard pile. God tells us not to live in the past but look to the future. I knew that without these regrets my future looks brighter and my load was already lighter.
I looked in the corner of the room of my mind and saw an old cracked mirror that made my features distorted and ugly. I did not look like that did I? I did not like this reflection of myself. This image was the result of years of self-pity and self-doubt. My face was so ugly in this mirror I could not stand to look into it so I threw it on the discard pile and watched it shatter.
I also saw a giant tapestry that displayed a spirit of pride. I have been able to accomplish goals and felt that I had been able to do this on my own with no help from anyone. I sometimes looked down on someone not as educated or as capable as I thought myself to be. I had put on an air of superiority when I had accomplished something that I felt was important to the world. My spirit of self-importance had hindered my testimony and witness for my Savior and had caused some people to fall by the wayside. Suddenly, a feeling of shame came over me. I began to see that without the help of my family and friends I could not have accomplished anything at all. this was the moment that God had whispered in my ear," Remember your favorite verse in Philippians – I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength ." without me you can not do anything . I threw the tapestry in the discard pile with a silent prayer of thanks to God . " Thank you God for giving me the strength and knowledge to accomplish what you have set before me to do.”
After I had thrown all the mental and spiritual clutter that had accumulated in my life throughout the years, I feel down on my knees to thank God and ask him to help me keep control of the thoughts that I let in my mind and the feelings that lived in my heart . He lovingly said to me , " I have waited for you to ask. You have attempted to live life on your own terms. I have been waiting here for you to surrender all the clutter so that I can fill your heart and soul with good things. I want you to experience life to the fullest. I will now fill you with joy, love, compassion, and encouragement . I have a purpose in mind for your life and those plans are to bring you happiness and prosperity . They are not plans to harm or cause hurt to you."
After clearing the clutter, I found I had room in my mind and life for the good things that God had for me. I do realize that this clearing was not a one-time only job but is a job that must be done regularly to ensure that I will have room for God's blessing
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